I've asked him to leave...

[mitzigollop]

It went ok but we have more to come. The counsellor mainly focused on my 'issues' and she even thought that i might have suffered from pnd which i was quite shocked and upset about. I know i had baby blues and i know i found it hard because it was just me and Ruby during the working week but i don't think i had pnd. If i did then i think it would have been a mild form of it (if that's possible, i don't know). What upset me the most was that this woman was telling me she thinks i might have suffered with depression and my husband didn't even notice. Anyway i've been up and down over the last month (i have lost almost a stone in weight to prove it!), it's been tough, some moments i'm up and other times i'm so angry i can't control what i say to him.
Saying that, things are improving and he's moving back in on Sunday night.
We even had a 'date' last night which was fun, it was only bowling (i won of course) but it was nice to get out and try to have fun!
am going to my parents tomorrow and have decided that i'm going out on the lash on fri night with my lil sis. Boy do i need it!
how's things your end Ellie?

[Leahbird]

oh hun glad to hear things are starting to come together and that is good that he is moving back in. hang in there!
xxx

[dara07]

Glad ye are tryin to work things out.
Enjoy night out wit your sister! D xx

[noababy]

Originally Posted by mitzigollop

It went ok but we have more to come. The counsellor mainly focused on my 'issues' and she even thought that i might have suffered from pnd which i was quite shocked and upset about. I know i had baby blues and i know i found it hard because it was just me and Ruby during the working week but i don't think i had pnd. If i did then i think it would have been a mild form of it (if that's possible, i don't know). What upset me the most was that this woman was telling me she thinks i might have suffered with depression and my husband didn't even notice. Anyway i've been up and down over the last month (i have lost almost a stone in weight to prove it!), it's been tough, some moments i'm up and other times i'm so angry i can't control what i say to him.
Saying that, things are improving and he's moving back in on Sunday night.
We even had a 'date' last night which was fun, it was only bowling (i won of course) but it was nice to get out and try to have fun!
am going to my parents tomorrow and have decided that i'm going out on the lash on fri night with my lil sis. Boy do i need it!
how's things your end Ellie?

Firstly I am glad that things seem to be shaping up.(and great job on weight loss though I do not want YOUR diet!)

I have to say thought that I am more than a little disappointed that she focused mainly on you. It takes two to make a situation what it is. As far as the PND-I would ask for a second opinion really, because you should know for sure as best as you can if that's what it was before her basing her whole "treatment" around that fact.
I also think that in these situations, it is often best to have a male therapist, cause with women, at some point (usually when they start hearing things about themselves they don't like), the men start to lump a female therapist together with all women and she just joins a line of people who have made him unhappy over the course of his life and her viewpoint then turns uncredible.(IS THAT A WORD?) Unless of course she doesn't take him to task over his problems but that would be a pity.

Are you happy with the therapist? Maybe I am reading your words wrong but I didn't get the sense that you were enthused with her.

Lots of hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

[BenandBellasMummy]

I hope Relate can work for you, have a few for me on Friday. HUgs xxx

[Bubba82]

ahhh babe good to hear you had a date night, amybe you need to go right back the beginning by having date nights etc to try and re-ignite the spark?? Hope the therapy works but really think she shouldn't be making assumptions that you suffered from depression, surely only a medical professional can diagnose that?? x

[rhianwen]

glad things are moving in the right direction for you have a good night on friday xxx

[Claire76]

Hey hun, have only just seen this. Firstly I'm so sorry you're having to go through all this. I don't know what happens to men when a child comes along but it's the biggest strain I have ever known in my life. We too have been having some really major problems and it was all over. The house went on the market and everything. BUT we had the most enormous talk of our lives, started out very heated but by the end was very calm, I guess because we both thought it was over, we just didn't hold back on anything we said to one another, so everything came out, annoying habits, home truths etc and it gave my hubby an enormous wake up call. Not that I am perfect () because I'm not by far but he did realise that he was the one with the most issues to work on. Things since have been ok, not brilliant but he is really making the effort, although having said that with everything going on with me at the moment I think that also might be some of the reason but whatever it is, we are a little happier. Your "Date" is a fab idea and we too have said we really need time to be on our own together, to start dating again to freshen things up and make it fun again. So we are going to try really hard to go out at least once a month together. I hope it works out for you, at the time we're screaming at them that we hate them and to leave and never come back etc etc etc, but deep down we want them to stay, we DO love them and we DO want it to work. I have my fingers crossed for my lovely and I will be thinking of you loads. Lots of love xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Rachael1]

So glad to hear he is moving back in and that you had so much fun together on your date. It seems on the right track so will keep rooting for you.