I've asked him to leave...

[maxi]

It must be so hard for you. Hope everything works out the way you want them to xx

[BenandBellasMummy]

Was just going to pm you, didn't think you'd been on much recently. BIg hugs, I really hope this time apart will make him realise what he'd be missing, there's always someone here if you want to chat xxx

[noababy]

Originally Posted by mitzigollop

on the up side the 'my husbands being an arsehole' diet has helped me loose 6lbs in about 2 weeks so it's not all bad

I'll start with the pmsl for the diet.

But seriously big big hugs!!!!! I am sure it is difficult and every person deals with things differently. (which is why maybe your hubby is out pubbing...)

I would highly suggest counseling for yourself even without hubby right now. I would also be honest with yourself and write yourself a list of things you love about your hubby, a list of things that bother you. I would also write a list of things that you know you have been doing wrong in the relationship (because for a relationship to go sour, both parties have accountability). Then try to figure out why you were doing those things. It will give you some insight into what the problems really are, not just what the symptoms are.

Lots of hugs and pm me if you need anything!

Hang in there!

[Anna07]

Oh my god massive massive hugs, I really really feel for you.

I really hope he can sort his head out and that you can work things out between you for the best whether that is being together or apart. From what you said it sounded as though things couldn't go on as they were so I think, as hard as it must be for you at the moment, this is for the best as it will force a decision to be made and at least then you can move forward.

Big big hugs

A xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[katieharry]

Really feel for you hun, can understand your fear of being without him after being together for so long, but you need to ask yourself do you want to be with him because its what your used to or are you still in love with him an feel happy when you think of your future together?
Susie has given fantastic advice (as always! )
hope you both can work things out very soon, keep your chin up an be strong for your beautiful little girl xx

[noababy]

Originally Posted by katieharry

yourself do you want to be with him because its what your used to or are you still in love with him an feel happy when you think of your future together?
xx

This is another very good point. You have a shared history with this person and you are used to someone who knows what you went through, things that have happened in your life... When people break up and start new, they are always measuring the new person up against the old even if they were miserable with the old person because with any new person, you don't have the shared ground, memories... It always takes time to readjust to a new reality, and besides any company sometimes is better than being alone and lonely (like when you come home and no hubby is there, you will feel sad cause right now you are alone)

More hugs!!

[rhianwen]

Huge hugs hun xxxxx

[mitzigollop]

Originally Posted by noababy

This is another very good point. You have a shared history with this person and you are used to someone who knows what you went through, things that have happened in your life... When people break up and start new, they are always measuring the new person up against the old even if they were miserable with the old person because with any new person, you don't have the shared ground, memories... It always takes time to readjust to a new reality, and besides any company sometimes is better than being alone and lonely (like when you come home and no hubby is there, you will feel sad cause right now you are alone)

More hugs!!

yeah you are both right and i need to make sure i still want him, things have been crap but that's not to say we can't turn that around. I need to get my head set as well so hopefully some time apart will help both of us. x

[Rachael1]

I think sometimes it can be good to take some time out. Me and OH had a time a few months back when I almost send him to his mother's for a while. I think blokes sometimes feel like nothing should change for them when a baby comes along, as if the child is the mother's responsibility. It can sometimes freak them when they realise they can't go on as they have been.

Here's hoping the time out does him and, most importantly, you, some good. Like the others have said, try working out what you want for the future, for you and your lovely Ruby.

Big hugs too.
xxx

[monica23535]

((((Huge hugs)))

Everyone has given really good advice.

xxx