When I was pregnant I bought everything I would need for breastfeeding; creams, pads, pillows, and even a scarf designed to make breast feeding in public more comfortable. When my husband asked if perhaps we should buy some formula "just in case" I was quite surprised. It hadn't even entered my mind that I wouldn't be able to breastfeed. I read all the books, and I even (although I am a little embarrassed to admit this) typed out a breastfeeding routine for the first week (and laminated it
I blamed it on the nesting!).
However things didn't quite work out as I had envisioned. Giving birth turned out to be very traumatic and landed me in intensive care (I will spare you the details!). Needless to say, breastfeeding immediately after birth was not an option. When I was strong enough to put my little one to the breast she was unable to latch on. By this stage she was beside herself with hunger and I was an emotional mess. While in hospital my husband and I had the professional advice (re: the best approach to solve our breastfeeding woes) from 2 pediatricians, 3 hospital midwives, 2 private midwife, 1 obstetrition and numerous nurses. The general consensus was to "make her" drink from the breast by offering nothing else and simply waiting it out. My Doctor said that it was perfectly fine for my little girl to not have any fluids for up to 5 days. He also said that she was being (and I quote) a "drama queen"... she was 3 days old! So I followed their advice and tried to force her to take the breast. The poor little poppet just couldn't latch on. In the end the skin on her lips started to peel off because she was so dehydrated and she lost her voice from screaming constantly. It was heart breaking.
We took our little one home and I started expressing. My milk didn't come in for 8 days, so in the meantime I still kept trying to breastfeed and gave my daughter whatever colostrum I could "extract". By day 6 my little one would actually suck at the breast (with the aid of a nipple shield) for 5 minutes but would fall off screaming with hunger. I went to the chemist and bought a tin of formula - naively buying the smallest one they had as I thought once my milk came in I would be able to express enough for every feed (with spare milk to freeze!) until my little girl got the hang of feeding.
By the time my daughter was 5 weeks old I had tried every nipple shield available (my sister-in-law had even sent me some from Japan that she had found useful!), I had tried feeding in every position documented, and I was expressing every three hours to try and build up my milk supply. I had managed to get my poppet to suckle but found that she still couldn't latch on effectively, and was constantly falling off, plus it was excruciating!! To make matters worse, I was having to give her top-up feeds of formula which were making her constipated.
We were both physically and emotionally exhausted. I had reached the end, and I honestly didn't know what to do. The feelings of guilt and failure were overwhelming.
I decided to get online and see if I could track down the contact details for Clare Byam-Cook. To cut a long (very long) story short my husband and I made the trip to visit Clare and see if she could help. The first thing she noticed was that our daughter was tongue tied. Not one other professional had noticed/mentioned this. (We have since been to our pediatrician who told us it is quite a severe case of tongue tie and advised us to have it cut - which we are having done next week.) My poor little girl had not been latching onto my breast properly because she couldn't. It also accounted for "falling off" the breast even though she was still hungry. Clare then produced a nipple shield that resembled a bottle teat. Not only did my daughter latch on but I saw her sucking effectively for the first time in 8 weeks!!!
My husband and I had flown from Spain to meet with Clare. Although it was not an easy journey to make with an 8 week old, it was worth every second. Clare's patience, warmth and professionalism were amazing. What a wonderful person!
Thank you Clare.
